Donny is as Donny does…

So I went to the opera for the first time…and some birthdays…

Hello, interweb! I would like to talk to you about something real for a moment. This is something close to my heart and also something I don’t really talk about often. I feel fat. Not the ordinary “we’re all a little overweight” kind of fat, but actually fat. Since I was a kid, I always had some kind of battle with my weight. Now however, it’s gotten to a point that is really bringing me down. This mixed with my surprisingly unknown or commonly overlooked self esteem issues has created a black hole of self doubt and loathing. It’s amazing how little it takes to deliver a crushing blow to the self esteem of someone who has issues with their weight. “You used to be so skinny.” “Your face is so fat.” Simple, seemingly non-offensive things to say but they sting nonetheless.

Don’t get me wrong. I love me, I think I’m at least decent looking, I’m a nice guy, talented and all that but at the end of the day it’s all about feeling comfortable in our own skin…and I do not. I don’t have some crazy skewed idea of myself in my head either. I know I’m not this big, gelatinous blob, but I do know a couple problem areas I’d like to go away. A friend of mine, Clarence, said “You didn’t gain this weight overnight so don’t think you’re going to lose it overnight.” Wise words. Everyone who is out to lose weight is always looking for the quick fix. Well when have you ever known a “quick fix” to be of any real quality? Changing my lifestyle and really digging deep when it comes to this is where I’m headed. With that said, I plan on taking all of you with me on this journey. I’m pretty bad at blogging everyday so it doesn’t seem likely that I will keep a daily journal of my fight with fat but let’s start today and see how it goes. Fair? Fair!

In the morning, I plan on going to the gym. I will document how long I stayed and the activities I did while I was there. Since you’re all coming with me on this little-big venture, feel free to give me tips, ideas and inspiration. Trust me, I’ll need it. Time to put together a playlist and lace up my track shoes! See you guys at the gym!

Keanna, Kami and Kadence!

Helped a couple friends move…

So I’m at breakfast with Kay Kay and it seems I’m not the only one who keeps a journal. Of course, mine doesn’t have to do with boys, fashion and makeup.
I’m WordPressing from my phone. Seems to be working out pretty good. Maybe if I keep this up, I’ll actually blog much more consistently.

We’re at pancake house right now. I’ll snag a picture of my blueberry pancakes if I don’t inhale them first. Is it bad that I gave up red meat for Lent but I’m

eating bacon? Bacon is a white meat though. So I’m technically I’m in the clear.

The cool guy sitting next to us just said “Bacon’s a food group.” I totally agree! Breakfast altogether is my fav! (And it was delicious!) Now it’s off to the movies.

The movie Paul was funny! I give it 3/5. It slowed down too often and it was a little long, but I enjoyed it.

“Love makes for a completely irrational human being.”

“Love is a really pure, ULTIMATE emotion. What other emotion makes you feel EVERYTHING?!”

“Behold! The power of love wins again!”

Do you know where those three quotes came from? For no particular reason at all, I was flipping through one of my old journals. Yes, long before the blogs, before the Facebooks and Twitters of the world, I kept journals. Well, I randomly selected three things I wrote in there and slapped them here on DonnyLB.com. After reading them again, do you know what I realize? I was an ooey-gooey, emotional mess! I suppose that’s not much of a revelation, but it sure feels like news to me. Sure, I still might talk a big game about love and how much it means to me and all that, but nothing compares to the post-adolescent ramblings of nice guy with his heart on his sleeve. Whew, that thing is touching. It also reminds me how naive and foolish I used to be. But, we live and we learn, right?

The love thing doesn’t really bother me. I know I’m still capable of that type and extent of emotion. I’m not a robot nor have I changed all that much–it at all. I suppose I ‘ve just become a little more jaded and careful. There’s still nothing better than the taste of the sweet nectar that is love. Over the years I just leaned it’s a little more complicated than they lead you to believe at the happy endings of stories. The two people may ride off into the sunset in a lovers embrace but who knows whether or not they got the minivan and white picket fence. Ah, journal. You really made me think.

I can say one thing. There’s something I miss about the feel of a journal. The way the pen feels as it glides across the fresh lined paper. The small flash of curiosity that flashes into my mind wondering how long the entry will be and whether it will end up on another page. The barely noticeable jabs my brain gives me when I write sentence fragments (I guess that one is a keeper on paper or screen.) Who knows, maybe I’ll start writing in a journal again. I’m a fairly private person and although I blog, I never write down very much of my personal life here on the internet.

That’s it for now. Just a short, little entry after a short, little trip down dusty journal lane.

What’s your favorite Christmas song?